This article was originally published on ParentMood
Chores On The Mind
Sometimes a name just happens to sound like something else by coincidence. That is if you believe in coincidences. It's entirely possible this person just wanted their child to have a weird and silly name. Either way, this kid's sure to catch some flak at school with a name like Laundreigh Daiye. Nobody's going to want to mess with someone with a name that reminds them of their chores.
If this wasn't on purpose, then the dad here needs to step up. The mother obviously can't get her chores off her mind, so much so that she unintentionally named her child after laundry day.
As If Frost Wasn't Weird Enough
We've seen some pretty weird names on this list thus far, and this next one might be our favorite so far. It had us literally laughing out loud the second we read it. Designer Kerwin Frost and his wife named their kid Waffle Frost. It's strangely adorable and hilarious at the same time, but we're sure this kid probably isn't going to see it that way in 15 years.
It also reminds us of Waffle House, which would not be nearly as adorable. However, when you have the word waffle in your name, the comparisons are going to be hard to escape from.
At Least He's Come To Terms With It
As we've mentioned before, parents sometimes want to make their child's name stand out by spelling it differently. Sometimes mothers, still feeling the effects of pain killers after giving birth, just spell names wrong. We're not entirely sure, but that sounds like what happened here. Instead of spelling their son's name "Jason" like normal people, they spelled it "Jhayson". However, this guy seems to have come to terms with the weird spelling and even used it as his Tinder bio.
It's still kind of weird that his parents can't remember why they spelled his name the way they did, but the only explanation we can think of is the painkiller theory.
When You Just Want To Troll
None of the unique spellings we've seen so far can top this. Someone sent this photo of their newborn to their family members. In it, they spell their baby's name, "Pynnelopeigh Rhozuhleighay". Luckily, it was all just a joke and they didn't really spell their kid's name like this. Which is a relief because the first thing we thought when we saw this was, "Is this a joke?!" However, it's not that far off to think someone out there probably has a similarly spelled name.
Penelope is a pretty straightforward name, meaning there are bound to be parents out there that want to set their kid apart from others for one reason or another.
A Mother's Love
This woman's mother was one of culture. You can tell because she combined Eastern and Western influences when picking out names for her daughter. She decided on Teriyaki Antionette. Yes, the best of both worlds. One bankrupted the French nation and caused a revolution and the other is just good when watching the game on a Saturday night. However, there is one silver lining to this whole situation.
This woman is clearly confident enough to make fun of herself and that's a trait more people should have. We have a feeling it's due in no small part to her name.
Bullying Kids Before They're Even Born
Many names that start with Anna and are followed up with something like Marie or Bell are pretty old-fashioned. If you see someone with a name like this today, it's almost certain that they had a relative with the same name. However, you have to be careful how you spell and change names like this, as this user found out on social media. Luckily, someone noticed and let them know before the name was on the birth certificate.
If she hadn't, this kid would've likely had a rough time when they got to high school. However, it just goes to show what can happen when someone tries to overcomplicate the spelling of a name.
Some Parents Are The Worse
To be totally honest with you, we aren't entirely sure how you're supposed to pronounce these twins' names. G'Kayden and G'Kaylen just sound like someone made a typo and accidentally threw a "g" in there. However, these are real names and unfortunately, these real kids are going to have to go to a real school and get real bullied in the process. Maybe the parents thought the names "Kayden" and "Kaylen" were just too bland or something.
We also feel bad for the teachers who have to call out these names every day to take attendance. Could you imagine having to ask where G'Kayden and G'Kaylen are every day?
Truer Words Were Never Spoken
This quote is actually from the movie Mean Girls, but it works great here. We also imagine this is how your friends and family would feel if you were to ever give your child a weird name - angry, disappointed, and confused are just a few of the emotions they'd experience. Anfernee might sound like a quirky and fun way alternative to Anthony, but in reality, it's just a weird name everyone is going to hate, including family.
If you named your kid that in real life and they got mad that their uncle sometimes called them "Anthony", just imagine what they probably feel like when classmates and teachers constantly mess up their name.
Parents Today Are Weird
The is a photo that was taken of an actual Valentine's day list. Yes, that's a real list of children's names. The girls' column reads like this list, with only a few exceptions, such as Ann Marie and maybe Alaina and Reagan. But, the boys' column isn't much better with names like Chance, (we know a dog named Chance), Cruz, and Knox. Not to mention how weird the spelling is for some of these already unique names.
We're not sure why all of these parents wanted to be really extra, but we're kind of glad that we now know there are people out there willing to name their children Astride and Crimsyn.
Great Idea
This is what happens when you try and go too unique with your child's name. You end up with a name that has Roman numerals in it. It might seem clever on the surface to swap out the "ait" in Kaitlyn with the Roman numerals "VIII", but they might as well of just thrown an "8" in there instead. It's all the same thing. At least they accomplished one thing though.
Their daughter's name really is unique. But, unique doesn't always mean better, especially not when your daughter has to spend the rest of her life with Roman numerals in her name.
A True Test Of Friendship
They just keep coming, don't they? We thought the last name was hilarious, but this tweet is just as funny. She also has a pretty good point. Finding out your best friend named their kid Euripides Barclay Smith probably does change the way you look at that person. It's probably going to change the way other children look at that kid as well. Can you imagine addressing your friend as Euripides?
We mean, it might be kind of cool at first to sound like you're back in classical Greece. But, we're sure it'd get tiring after a couple of times of saying it.
That's Pretty Subtle
This is probably one of the worst names on this list, and not just because of the name. Someone asked their Facebook group for advice on naming their kid, but clearly already made up their mind. They want to go with "Krissmiss Dae". Now, being born on Christmas is already bad enough. We mean, you can pretty much guarantee your birthday is going to be overshadowed and combined with the Christmas holiday.
But, to have your entire name based on the holiday is a bit much. The spelling is also a not-so-subtle attempt at trying to disguise the name. We mean, why would you spell the word day as "dae" at this point?
Stick To The Classics
This actually happens quite a bit. A parent doesn't want their son or daughter's name to be too common. However, they also don't want it to be too old fashioned. So, they just make up a name that they think sounds good. However, there's a reason we have tried and true names. That's because most everything else is either already taken or just sounds weird. Unfortunately for this parent, Latrina was already taken.
Even if you don't speak whatever language Latrina means toilet in, it's not hard to hear the similarities. We mean, latrine and Latrina are only a letter apart.
Huh?
Most of the people giving advice on this list so far have seemed pretty trustworthy. Whoever came up with this name is not. Someone was asking around for names that could be used for both boys and girls. You know, names like Arron or Alex. However, someone chimed in with the name Richard, which is probably the furthest thing from a name you could use for both genders.
The name Richard makes us think of an older man with a mustache every time we hear it. Not only is it not the best name for a little girl, but it's probably not the best name for a little boy either.
Clever Thinking
It can be hard to come up with a name with your partner. You both have different ideas about what might sound nice, while still being unique. However, there are times when someone mentions a potential name and it just doesn't resonate with you. If that ever happens, then just do what this father did. After his wife suggested they name their baby Brayleigh, he quickly responded that he knew of a corgi with the same name.
While it wouldn't be the worse name on this list, it's not the most unique and the spelling just makes it look pretentious. So, the next time you're talking with someone and you have reservations about their naming plans, just mention that you know a dog with the same name.
Forward Thinking
Names in sci-fi shows usually fall under one of two categories. They're either absurdly futuristic or surprisingly contemporary. Apparently, this person thought it was about time people started looking towards the future and naming their kids Spock and Zotap. While there's something to be said for creating the future you want, this isn't the way to do it. It's like the new Tesla truck. Does it look futuristic? Sure. Does it look aesthetically pleasing? Not really (Sorry Tesla fans).
This person's theory would also only work if everyone adopted it. If their kid is the only one with a futuristic-sounding name, then they're going to catch a lot of flak from classmates.
No One Wants To Be Reminded
Whoever made this meme needs to be careful. There are probably parents out there who would think this was a clever name. And while Kobe Byrant was an all-around great person and role model, nobody wants to be reminded of Covid-19. Kobe passed away around the same time the virus started picking up and spreading around the world. It's been responsible for lockdowns, event cancelations, and just general disarray everywhere since it first popped up.
If you're going to name your child after Kobe Bryant, then we recommend just going all in and switching the first name to Kobe. There's no need to memorialize Covid-19.
Mom's Favorite Dish?
There are plenty of weird things to name your child after, but a type of food is probably one of the weirdest. There's simply no way to make a food sound elegant as a name. It's not even a matter of wanting to come up with something original and missing the mark. When you're named after a food, like the person who made this tweet, people automatically know your parents either really didn't feel like trying or wanted to mess with their kids for the rest of their lives.
This young woman goes by Cass, because her parents decided to name her Casserole. We're not sure what was going on here because that's not even a very appetizing dish.
Get Over Here Dirt
We aren't entirely sure, but we hope this list was just posted as a joke. Apart from Air Bud (it was a great movie), every other name on this list is just ridiculous unless your objective is to scar your kid for life. Plantation has negative connotations, Meighbelline is a makeup brand, Dirt is just plain wrong, and the second to last name; well, we shouldn't have to tell you why you shouldn't name your kid that.
Again, this entire list is probably just a joke someone posted online, but after seeing some of the names on this list, we wouldn't be entirely surprised to find someone named Scanch out there.
Can We Get The Phonetics?
We understand the urge some parents might have to set their child's name apart by using unconventional spelling. But, just remember that you're condemning that child to a lifetime of having to repeatedly tell people how to spell their name. Then they'll have to explain how it makes sense and why they spell it the way they do. Take Kayleigh Mcaneny for example. The last name is already so jam-packed with vowels you practically need a phonetic explainer to pronounce it correctly.
Add in the first name's spelling and there isn't a teacher alive that's not going to constantly mess this name up while calling attendance every day.
Got 'Em
This is from a pretty hilarious exchange that happened on Twitter in 2017. For some reason, a woman named Kaela tried to go after Moonpie's official Twitter account. However, she ended up getting roasted for the spelling of her name. We won't go over every detail because the photo is pretty self-explanatory, but we are wondering what drove Kaela to tell the world she doesn't like moon pies.
Maybe someone threw a moon pie and hit her in the head a little too hard with one while she was at a Mardi Gras parade or something. Either way, it just goes to show why you shouldn't give your children weirdly spelled names.
Don't Do This To Your Kids
Before looking at this list, we used to think people who were overly adamant about traditional spellings and grammar were just snobs. However, now we're convinced that you just can't trust people and that there'd be chaos if everyone was allowed to come up with their own spellings. Take this post for example, which shows how someone with a love for obscure letters named their kids Jaxcksin and Roewhyn.
We're not even entirely sure what the second name is supposed to be, but we're pretty sure the first one is supposed to be "Jackson".
Changing A Letter Doesn't Really Help
We're not sure what the fascination with naming children after foods is all about, but this name is a bit more common. Someone showed up to meet their dad's girlfriend and learned that her name was cinnamon, but spelled with an "s". That actually kind of makes the name weirder. Why would you make an effort to hide the fact that you named your child cinnamon? And if you were going to try and hide it, why just change a single letter?
With that said, the name Cinnamon isn't all that uncommon. There have been a couple of songs dedicated to fictional women named Cinnamon, so we can see why someone might name their child this.
Don't Feel Too Sorry For Him
When publications start writing entire articles about how to pronounce your baby's name, you might have gone a little overboard. That's what happened when Elon Musk announced that he'd name his son X AE A-XII. The Washington Post actually wrote an explainer after the announcement and in it, they clarified that AE is pronounced like "ash". You'll have to figure out how you want to pronounce that in combination with the rest of the letters and numbers, but some just went with X for short.
Since then, it's been announced that the little boy's younger sister will be called Y. So, maybe both of them could use whatever book this photo is referring to. However, we probably shouldn't feel too sorry for them, considering they have one of the richest fathers in the world.
Can We Just Drop This Idea?
We've already seen Covid Bryant, but this one is probably worse. Someone sent out a tweet saying they didn't want to see anyone naming their kid Ko'rona Vyress. It's a pretty reasonable thing to ask. Not only is the pandemic a weird thing to want to commemorate, but any child with this name and spelling is going to get made fun of the second they get to school.
It's not like Covid-19 is going to go away, and kids are going to know what it is 10 years from now. It's like naming your kid "Poe Leo". It doesn't take a genius to figure out you're named after a life-threatening illness.
Save The Weird Names For Pets
We know we already said that it's only appropriate to name pets and boats weird names, but these were just too good not to throw on the list. Someone took their cat, Missy, to the vet and revealed that the cat's real name was Missile Launcher, which is a perfect name for a cat. And it turns out that it's pretty common to give animals names other than Buddy and Rex.
So, if you ever have the urge to give your child a weird name, just save it for your pet. It's much more adorable and it'll save your son or daughter some teasing at school.
Which One Is The Worst?
Here we were thinking the worst white kid names were Braylen, Kayson, and Zayden, but nope. This person's mother, who is a teacher, actually had a couple of students with even worse names. We mean, who spells Damion with a silent "y"? That sounds like something you might see a celebrity do. Also, the girl named Free Love is going to have such a hard time at school.
The last name is actually kind of understandable, considering some parents might still be pretty drugged up when asked to fill out a birth certificate. But, that parent should've gone and got it changed for their kid when they were younger.
When You Can't Escape A Bad Name
While your parents are definitely to blame if you end up having a bad first name, it's harder to know who to blame for last names. If you have a bad last name, you're really just saddled with it for life. Changing your last name, for whatever reason, is much more serious than changing a first name. That's probably why Festus Orestes Butt never changed his. In all seriousness - where did these last names hail from?
However, he could've easily changed his first and middle name because nobody speaks Latin and the Roman Empire isn't around anymore. Then again, if you're going to keep a Latin name, there are worse professions to be in than law.
This Makes Us Whinsleigh
If you're confused about what this kid's name is supposed to be, it's actually pronounced Quinsley. That's not an uncommon or weird name by any stretch. However, when you turn Quinsley into Qwinzleigh, people are going to ask why. This spelling is just barely recognizable. We're also pretty sure that this poor kid had some issues learning how to spell it using letters most elementary schoolers have only come across one or two times their entire lives.
Like seriously, if this child got held back for not knowing how to spell their own name, then that's on the parents. We're out of school and even we have trouble spelling Qwinzleigh.
Turning Your Kids Into Tongue Twisters
Remember when we were talking about the worst names for white kids earlier? Well, we might've just found them. We're not even going to try and repeat these names in the text because, to be honest with you, we're not exactly sure how you pronounce them. If you are so brave, then you can read them in the photo. The only one that we're fairly sure about is Drawsonne, but even that just makes us wonder why.
It's pretty much guaranteed that teachers and friends are going to have to call these two by nicknames, if just for the fact that they're impossible to pronounce.
Rip Van Winkle Is Back In Fashion
This name actually has us a little torn. On one hand, the name Rip makes it sound like we should say RIP every time we say this kid's name, which doesn't seem like much fun. On the other hand, Rip Van Winkle is a pretty awesome character. Either way, classmates are probably going to give this kid a hard time when he gets to school. There are just too many possibilities here.
The last thing you want to do when naming your child is to make it easy for future bullies, which is exactly what these parents are doing by giving their child a name with so many meanings.
Don't Do That To This Child
This is probably one of the funniest names on this list, but for that reason, it's also probably one of the saddest. Someone decided that they were going to name their little girl Crystaleanor Dazzlequeen. Now, that's a dream name for a little girl that's four or five years old. But, it's nightmare for someone in school. This kid is either going to have to figure out how to really own the name or come up with a nickname.
It's really a shame that kids are so cruel because if we're being honest, we think that Dazzlequeen is actually a pretty awesome name to have.
The Only Time It's Appropriate
While the rest of the names we've looked at so far have been for people, this one is for a horse. The only time it's appropriate to give someone or something a silly name is when it's a pet or boat. So, this post is pretty lighthearted compared to the last. A girl asked around for ideas concerning her horse, and someone shot back "Caberneigh". For context, the mother's name was Red Wine.
All in all, Caberneigh is probably, comparatively, a better name than half the others we've looked at so far. Even the spelling makes sense here.
Not So Thrilled
This guy's text explains perfectly how most kids with weird names out there really feel. His parents named him Kyodie, which sounds strikingly similar to the word coyote. But, he isn't as thrilled about it as whoever he's texting in this screenshot, which is understandable. Whoever he's texting doesn't have to live with the name. It's like thinking that your niece and nephew are the cutest things to ever grace the planet.
Sure, they look adorable from afar, but if you have to take care of them all day, we're pretty sure that you'd be changing your tune pretty soon.
On The Same Level As Roll Tide
Picking names is hard, especially if you're a zealous sports fan apparently. It's not uncommon for people around the world to name their children after things like coaches and teams, but it's still pretty weird. This parent ended up naming their child Beauxeigh because many people in Louisiana speak French and because Geaux Tigers is a popular football chant in the state. However, this is akin to someone from Alabama naming their child roll tide, (which has most likely happened).
And no offense to either, they're both great football teams, but they should probably be left out of names. Unless you do name your child Beaux. That's an actual name that sounds okay.